The Morning Blotter: Man Uses Bicycle to Fend Off Knife Attack

Tasers? Over. Guns? Done. The latest and greatest in self-defense? Bike Kwon-Do.

Just before 1:00 AM on June 10th, two police officers on patrol in the East Precinct spotted two men fighting on the corner of E Pike St and Minor Ave.

One man had a butcher knife in his hand, and was trying to stab a second man.

Officers saw the suspect raise his knife and stab at the victim, who blocked the attack with the bicycle’s frame, and threw the bicycle at the suspect.

Police turned on their emergency lights and pulled up near the two men.

According to police, when the armed suspect saw the officers, he tried to hide his knife behind a telephone pole.

Officers ordered both men to the ground at gun point and patted the men down.

Police found “a small baton stuffed down the front of the suspect’s pants,” the report says.

Hubba hubba.

Officers interviewed the victim, who said he was standing near his friend’s bike when the suspect came up and tried to take it.

The men argued and began shoving each other, and the suspect pulled out a knife.

The report says the victim wouldn’t answer some of the officers’ questions and told them he didn’t want the suspect to go to jail.

When officers asked the suspect why he’d tried to stab the victim, he told them he was simply trying to “stab the bike.”

Police booked the suspect for assault (presumably for attacking the other man, not the bike).